It is apparent that the people in my town have come to the conclusion that advertising is necessary to ensure business. At first I was a little appalled at their approach, but I have come to enjoy their efforts. One evening as I was driving through town, I noticed a hand-painted sign on plywood propped against a telephone pole outside our "sketchy" grocery store. In big dripping letters...it read, "MEAT $3.59 lb". Instantly, I thought..."What meat? All meat? Why is it all the same price? and Who on earth who go in there to buy anything that could expire (chances are it was long past that date?) It must have been quite a sale...the sign remained for months until a big gust of wind blew it over and people just drove over the top of it thinking it was a repair job for the potholes.
The following picture is a local example of "small town advertising"- also hand painted on plywood and propped up against a garbage can... I think you can tell the type of neighborhood you're in by the way they advertise their yard sales. I had to get out of my car and look at the merchandise...I bet you can only imagine what type of treasures I saw! Yes that is my "Purple People Eater Mid-Life Crisis" Car parked behind the sign!!!
I think sign-waivers can be very entertaining. The way they dance and move can be fun to watch as you almost hit the car in front of you. Of course not all businesses can pay someone to dance on the street...so there are mechanical mannequins that waive signs in a jerky motion that may attract interest. I've seen several of these advertising body piercing and tattoo parlors locally. But my all time favorite is our own "Chicken Man." I first saw "Chicken Man" last year when he was propped up against a sign that read "1 hour parking - 24 hours a day." I don't really know why someone would want to park by "Chicken Man" for more than an hour...let alone at all, but hey, let's obey the law! This must not be "Chicken Man's" first gig. In fact, I'm pretty sure this might be his last stop before retirement. "Chicken Man" has more than a few feathers missing and the ones left are black from traffic exhaust, his vinyl face is peeling from the sun, his cracked beak is crooked, he has one hand, a peg-leg, and a red sock on the other half-exposed leg. "Chicken man's" costume doesn't close in the back (how embarrassing), he is wearing a child's sombrero, and he is tied by the neck with a rope to the pole. "Chicken Man" does NOT conjure up images of juicy chicken cooked on a grill...yet...that is what he is advertising...in only Spanish! I wonder who their target group is?! "Chicken Man" stands by the side of the main highway that runs through town. He stands alone tied to the sign under a tree beside the "Sketchy" Grocery store that advertised "MEAT". There is usually a man standing behind "Chicken Man" at an oil drum, cut in half with smoke pouring out, poking the pollos with a long stick. As I drive by, I wonder if any of the pollos looked like "Chicken Man"...mangy and old!? I don't get an appetizing feeling from the sight. In fact, "Chicken Man" may be a great appetite suppressant for me.
A few months back, "Chicken Man" disappeared. It was left to our imaginations what could have possibly happened. Perhaps a car ran him over...he caught fire from the smoking oil drum...or he finally retired to the "Old Chicken Man Home...a.k.a. the dump." They advertised with the hand painted sign on plywood propped in front of the parking sign. It seemed lonely. Drab. Sad. I actually missed "Chicken Man." Then....a few weeks ago..."Chicken Man" returned! Apparently, he was just on vacation! Once again...the world has been put right! Well, at least as far as the mystery of "Chicken Man" is concerned.
I can't say small town advertising is perfect. But, I can say it is creative and a little endearing. So, next time you want to go to a "Big Ass Sale", buy some "Meat", or want some "Pollo" cooked on an oil drum...just visit the next small town you pass through...or Not...Olive Garden is 45 miles north!!!
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